The truly unbearable Agony of Jesus….

Jesus often complained to Sr. Benigna of the unfathomable sorrow of His Sacred Heart.   “Behold”, said Jesus; “I beg the love of My creatures, who refuse it to Me and squander it upon things which pass away. They do not even think of giving it to Me- if thou knewest, Maria, how painful it is to love so much and not to be loved! I do not grow weary, I am always seeking love and no one gives it to me; not only will they not love Me, but they hate Me. Dost thou know what hinders Me from striking sinners? It is the prayers of the just; they disarm My divine Justice.” (Words of Jesus to Servant of God, Sister Benigna Consolata.)

(c) Glasgow Museums; Supplied by The Public Catalogue Foundation
Cardinal Pietro Ottoboni (1667–1740)

My Jesus, why are You crying?  Why do you weep so, upon your knees, here in the Garden?  Is it because your apostles have fallen asleep and left you to suffer alone?

O my Jesus, I hear Your cry to Your Father:  If it is possible, let this cup pass from Me, but not as I will but as You will…..

What is this cup that you cannot bear, my Jesus?  Is it the physical pain You are about to undergo in your scourging and crucifixion?  Is it fear of this which has caused sweat to run infused with blood down your most adorable Face?

Yet, you are the bravest, most courageous, strongest and most fearless of all men.  Terrible, excruciating, horrific as your approaching torture may be, You said that it was for “this” that You had come into the world….this baptism which You so desired.  You Who long to give Your Life to save us; You Who cherish within Your Divine Heart the precious Name, Savior.  You could not be trembling in agony over the anticipation of your death.

What then?  What is worse than death?  What has parted the Heavens and moved Your Father to send an angel to comfort You in Your Truly Unbearable Agony?

They will not love Me!

The words echo over and over in Your Mind and the truth of them crushes Your Sacred Heart and more Blood flows….

So few will love Me!

I am God.  I am preparing to die for my creatures that they may become my children.  My Heart longs to undergo the suffering and death which await me so that they can share in my Divine Life and spend eternity with Me in my Kingdom of Love.  I have just given to them my Own Body and Blood to be their Food for the journey, and a foretaste of our union in Heaven.

Still, they will not love Me!

I can bear the scourging because as I watch my Own Blood pouring upon the ground, I will be consoled knowing that It will flow over My children, washing away their sins.

Let the nails fasten Me to the Cross, rendering Me helpless for a time, that the Graces of My Infinite Merits may transform and sanctify My children, infusing them with Divine Life.

I do not fear the sword which will pierce My Heart, for by this Wound,  My Heart shall become for my precious ones, a  Refuge of Peace, an Oasis of Rest, a Fountain of Grace and Mercy.

But, in spite of all of this, so many will hate and despise Me!

This is the pain which even Your God cannot bear.  I am Love.  I do not know how to do anything but Love.  I seek Love.  I hunger for the Love of my creatures.

But, they will not love Me!

The angel from Heaven arrives in the Garden. Suddenly, I do not feel so alone.  I see names and faces.  I see My children kneeling in prayer.  I see hands lifted in praise.  I feel kisses and caresses upon My Face.  I see tears of repentance.  I see hearts eagerly awaiting Me in Holy Communion.  I hear my little ones praying for Mercy for their sisters and brothers.  I hear My Name being called with so much love:  Jesus!  Jesus!  Oh how sweet is this to Me!

I feel My strength returning.  I rise from the ground.  I have not been completely abandoned and rejected.  There are some….some…..who will love Me.

I will not have died in vain.

If only there could be more…….

But for one alone, I would gladly go to the Cross.

I love you so much.

Will you love Me too?

Please give Me a chance to be Your Lord and Savior.

Trust in Me.

I am Jesus.

I am LOVE!

Friday meditation…are you His friend?

I call you friends,
because I have made known to you                                                              
everything I have learned from My Father.                                              
You did not choose Me,                                                                             

no, I chose you..   

John 15: ..15-16                                                                                         

painting by Carl Bloch

My Most Loving Jesus,
I hate all of my sins.
But I hate most of all
the times I have neglected You,
put You off, taken advantage
of Your Infinite Kindness and Patience.
Your beautiful eyes watched
as I walked away from
my breviary.
Your eager Heart waited
when I cut short my night prayers.
I am a Carmelite who professes
to live for You alone.
You have called me to be
Your intimate friend.
Yet, so often I am
no friend at all.
Still You are Faithful,
my beautiful Jesus.
I am so sorry.
I do love You.
Help me to be
Your devoted companion,
For You are so lonely
in the Gethsemane
that is this world.